HOMESICK

im in vancouver right now and i miss home. when does this ever happen when i finally get the break i need and i want to return. i must be crazed but its true. im sick and tired of this trip and its only been three days. my parents try so hard to initiate family time but it hardly exists anymore since our family has grown so disjointed. csi marathons in a penthouse 21st floor financial district vancouver. pretty nice i guess but im so tired and i just want to stay at home sometimes doing nothing. i feel so restless i could totally use that word we learned in lith what was it again something infatigable? iono but that class is major asskicking. EAST OF EDEN is actually good but its so dramatic. so vengeful and kind of good. revenge is good but payback feels so nice. but leaves you bitter at the same time. how has this trip been? im thinking of when my seven days are over. so far, we have avoided all attempts to snowboard since my smart sister managed to overpack from burberry rainboots which i hardly doubt she needs and her coach purse, still ables to forget to bring the ever essential ski gloves. so basically if shes not going to board, i hella am not going to board by myself. and we just keep on eating and eating. i went to the gym today. first time lifting weights. isnt that funny. i never lifted weights in my life and it was kinda fun. i watched some really skinny girl panting a lot. it was funny. new years eve. i just forgot new years resolution time
what do i wish to improve in the following year?
i think maybe to learn to move on. to forget about the past and focus on the future. mend my broken relationships and leave nobody with hurt feelings. do something that im passionate about, not what i should be doing. maybe think about going back to church. its not all that bad right? stop making excuses as well try harder in school stay focused. not so easily distracted or tempted.
i broke my phone. my phone means a lot to me. thats not good tho. i rely too heavily on sucha materialistic device. isnt it like that quote we dont ride the railroad, the railroad rides us or something. similarly, i use my phone for so many diff functions. and stupidly i broke it when i knew it would be broken if i did it. but still i wanted to test my options. smart bertrand. anyways im up here with no music except my crappy shuffle which repeats the same 100 songs over and over again. music : life. im bored
my family is boring
life is boring
i have so many things to do
liek DIVE INTO A GREAT READ such as EAST OF EDEN
amen